Thoughts (216 jokes)

Fighting for peace is like fucking for virgin.

• 🍆 Sex

First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win.

For the things we have to learn before we can do them, we learn by doing them.

Frederick is the best name because it has 6 names in it.

Give a man a fish and you’ll feed him for a day.
Teach a man to embrace the paradoxes of quantum mechanics and he’ll give himself the same fish over and over again in an eternal loop of temporal torment.

• 🔬 Scientist

Give a man a fish and you will feed him for a day.
Teach a man to fish and he will spend hundreds of dollars on equipment he will use twice a year.

Give a man a fish, he’ll eat for a day. Teach a man to fish, he’ll contribute to the global over depletion of the ocean.
So give him a salad, maybe.

Given that a radiator is essentially a vital organ to a car, it’s strange that the town in the movie Cars is called “Radiator Springs.”
It would be like if we called a city “Liver Pool.”