Paedophilia (9 jokes)

Anal sex is like brocolli. If you’re forced to have it as a kid, you won’t like it as an adult.

A priest has a heart attack, and is rushed to the hospital. He wakes up as he’s being rushed through the hospital on a gurney by two nurses.
“Am I in heaven?” asks the disoriented priest.
“No” says one of the nurses. “We’re just taking a short cut through the children’s ward”.

• ✝️ Christian

If you’re surprised that Jeffrey Epstein committed suicide, imagine how surprised he must have been.

• 🇺🇸 America

I like my women like I like my whiskey.
12 years old and mixed up with coke.

• 🍺 Alcohol

Pedophiles are fucking immatures assholes.

What’s the difference between EA and my uncle?

My uncle didn’t take my money when he fucked me.

• 🖥️ Technology

Why can’t Michael Jackson go within 500 meters of a school?

Because he’s dead.

Why did Elon Musk choose SpaceX to land on Mars?

Because if he chose SpaceY he’d land on 14 year old boys.

Yesterday my daughter was playing in the garden when I saw her kill a butterfly. So to teach her a lesson I said, “Just for that you don’t get any butter for a month.”
Today in the kitchen she killed a cockroach. I said, “Nice try.”