Thoughts (219 jokes)

You can go a long way with a smile. You can go a lot farther with a smile and a gun.

You don’t need a parachute to go skydiving. You need a parachute to go skydiving twice.

You know you’re not liked when you get handed the camera every time they take a group photo.

You’re cooler than me?
Guess that makes me hotter than you.

You’re never too old to learn something stupid.

You’re not scared of being alone in the dark. You’re afraid that you aren’t alone.

You shouldn’t say “shit-hole countries”.
The correct term is “turd-world countries”.