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Thoughts (216 jokes)
Instead of saying motherfucker you can just say Œdipus.
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In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.
Martin Luther King, Jr
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In your pursuit of “beginner friendly”, careful not to become “expert hostile”
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I really hope coronavirus can’t spread through sex.
It would be so lonely being the last man on Earth.
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I saw a chameleon today so I guess it was a pretty shitty chameleon
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I take Viagra for my sun burn…
It doesn’t cure it, but it keeps the sheets off my legs when I sleep.
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It pays to be obvious, especially if you have a reputation for subtlety.
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It’s messed up that couch sleepy never directly translates to bed sleepy.
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It’s only impostor syndrome if it comes from the Imposteur region of France, otherwise it’s just sparkling self-doubt
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It’s very rare that a defibrillator fails.
But when it happens no one is shocked.
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