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Scientist (70 jokes)

Horror film called “Occam’s Razor” about a razor shop owner and serial killer named Occam who kills people with razors, but the townspeople refuse to believe it could be him and advance increasingly absurd theories to explain the spate of razor deaths plaguing the town

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How many general relativists to change a light bulb?
Two. One to hold the bulb, the other to rotate the universe.
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I can’t believe Leonardo DiCaprio yelled “I’m on top of the world” from the Titanic, a ship, that was at sea. at sea level.
The scientifically lowest altitude in the world.

He was nowhere near the top, he was literally at the bottom. What a stupid idiot.

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If Miley Cyrus was Canadian she would be Kilometery Cryus.

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If Queen Elizabeth accidentally farts during dinner, the other guests are supposed to pretend like nothing happened.
Noble gases should have no reaction.

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If you choose an answer to this question at random what is the chance you will be correct?

A) 25%
B) 50%
C) 60%
D) 25%

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If you find gold in Australia where should you look for silver?
Agstralia
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If you say the radius of a pizza is “z” and its thickness is “a” — The volume of the pizza will be calculated by pi*z*z*a.

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If you watch NASA backwards, it’s about a space agency that has no spaceflights capability, then does low-orbit flights, then lands on moon.

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I get the feeling many non-mathematicians think mathematics would be easy if only it was translated out of mathematical notation.
I get the feeling many mathematicians think every other subject would be easy if only it was translated into mathematical notation.

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