I’m like an avocado: only pleasant for a short period of time, and it’s up to you to figure out when that is

I came, I clicked,

I’m like an avocado: only pleasant for a short period of time, and it’s up to you to figure out when that is.

A random joke?

Short joke 👇

At my funeral, take the bouquet off my coffin and throw it into the crowd to see who’s next.

Always go to people’s funerals, so they’ll come to yours.

More jokes 👇

A salesman checked into a futuristic hotel in Tokyo, Japan…
A wealthy politician released her tax returns for the public to view, according to custom…
🌓🌎🌞 ← lunar eclipse…
They say God only gives us what we can handle…
So when Jesus starts a holiday dinner with “one of you will betray me” it’s amazing and dramatic and evidence of his prophetic gifting, but when *I* do it I’m “just doing it for attention” and “either gonna to have to stop doing that every time or not be invited next year”?
I was standing in the line at McDonald’s yesterday and just as I got to the counter my boyfriend kissed me and then loudly said “you are the best sister ever” and walked away