Wife: I’m pregnant.
Me: Hi pregnant, I’m Dad!
Wife: No you’re not.
Short joke 👇
Zuckerberg: “the more you know about a person, the better conversation you can have with them.”
Obviously the guy has never been married.
More jokes 👇
- Someone in this world has consumed more mayonnaise than anyone else currently alive and they don’t even know it
- My daughter asked why she can’t just quit school…
- I’ll bet the best part of being a scientist is constantly having your hard work and research questioned by people who spent every science class peeling glue from their hands
- Anti-vaxers really be like “You’re just gonna listen to doctors who studied medicine for 10 years? Wow enjoy being sheep, I’m gonna listen to a stay at home moms Facebook page cause I’m an independent thinker”
- I have no pronouns…
- The asteroid that ended the dinosaurs was technically the highest ratio of killing birds to one stone in Earth’s history